I Eat Music

Well, that was another funny week. No, funny isn’t the word. I don’t even know what the word is.

It started shortly after last week’s Weekly went out. Reports started coming in that a man had killed himself on stage at a Swell Season gig in California. Hours later it was confirmed that, in an entirely separate turn of events, Ou Est Le Swimming Pool frontman Charles Haddon had committed suicide shortly after playing at the Pukkelpop festival in Belgium.

Add to that one pop type accused of punching his girlfriend, another convicted of sexual assault and one further death at Pukkelpop and by Monday morning you’ve got the most depressing edition of the CMU Daily ever.

Haddon’s suicide was probably the most depressing story of them all – it was an incident that was utterly devastating for all involved. Eddy Temple-Morris writes about this in his CMU column this week, and expresses things far better than I could. But there is something about Haddon’s death I do want to comment on: the way it was reported. And the way news stories can develop on the internet when few real facts are to hand.

When the first whispers of news started coming back from Belgium on Friday afternoon, it was claimed that another member of the band, Joe Hutchinson, had died. It was also noted that during the band’s set he had injured a woman in the audience when a stage dive went wrong. But once it was established that Hutchinson was still alive, this piece of information was dropped from most reports (including ours).

However, on Tuesday an Australian news outlet again reported this original rumour, but with one important difference: it was now Haddon who had injured the audience member. That report also included claims that Haddon had been overheard saying that he feared he’d crippled her, and that a “furious argument” with bandmates had occurred backstage after the show. Then there was the revelation that the woman is expected to fully recover from her injuries.

By Wednesday, this story had worked its way back to the UK and it was being reported widely that “new details have emerged” about Haddon’s death. Now, suddenly, this footnote to the original reports was being delivered as something separate, a story in its own right, a new ‘fact’ that could be used to aid speculation about what had caused Haddon to take his own life. Even though the fact was very possibly wrong and the speculation definitely baseless. Worse still, the speculation was soon reported as fact.

By Thursday one report distilled all this down to one sentence, telling us that the “inconsolable” Haddon cut the band’s set short after the stage dive incident and then killed himself. This is something that really doesn’t sit comfortably with me.

I understand that it’s natural to be curious about what happened, and it’s natural to connect events together to create a picture of what may have occurred. That’s how the human brain works.

Maybe it was Charlie, not Joe, who stage dived. Maybe he was genuinely fearful that the woman he landed on was permanently injured. Maybe instead of finding out, he went and killed himself. But maybe the two events were unrelated. Maybe, by suggesting a connection, someone’s more long standing pain and mental distress was completely belittled, condensing something awful down to nothing more than someone acting on a whim.

I’m not saying this news shouldn’t be reported. We report on rumours and speculation all the time. But if it is, such information needs to be treated very carefully. It needs to be acknowledged that the decision to end your own life is something complex and difficult for others to understand, and that rumours of events immediately before such shocking actions do not hold all the answers. In fact they almost certainly don’t. Claiming to have the story all sewn up in five days without having any of the real facts to hand helps no one.

This is taken from my editorial in the 27 Aug 2010 edition of CMU Weekly, which you can read in full here.

Hey, so it turns out that something on TV has been fiddled with in an attempt to make it more entertaining. How could something like this happen?

Okay, you might say this case is different. This is a singing competition. This is the ‘X-Factor’. This is a search for Great Britain’s next big vocal talent, and if the programme’s makers are applying Auto-tune to people’s voices, how are we to know who is genuinely the best singer?

Well, firstly, let’s not even pretend that ‘X-Factor’ is a singing competition. If it was, such a large proportion of the show wouldn’t be devoted to humiliating deluded people. People whose comically warped opinion of their own singing ability has already been spotted by the show’s production team in the early stages of the auditions (the ones before they actually get in front of Simon and co). This whole section of the series is about laughing at idiots, with the occasional break for a sob story or an introduction to a ‘possible future star’.

All of which makes it ludicrous that anyone would complain about Auto-tune software being used to make the good people sound better and the bad people sound worse. If everyone was portrayed as being as close to average as they probably are, it would make for some pretty dull television and everyone would complain that it was boring. And the last thing ‘X-Factor’ wants to be is boring.

Last Saturday a record 11.1 million people tuned in to watch the first episode of the new series. Some of them then accused the show of using Auto-tune. And the show’s makers readily admitted it, issuing a statement saying: “The judges make their decisions at the auditions stage based on what they hear on the day, live in the arena. The footage and sound is then edited and dubbed into a finished programme, to deliver the most entertaining experience possible for viewers. When it gets to the live shows, it will be all live”.

The people who spotted the vocal manipulation had not done so because they were specialists in audio production, but because it was plainly obvious. If you actually listen to the vocals that were edited on last weekend’s programme, the tweaks were applied so heavy-handedly (distorting, rather than tuning), and seemingly at random, that you can’t help thinking someone involved in the show wanted people to notice. Either that, or they’ve got someone new in to do their sound editing, and s/he’s incredibly rubbish.

As a result of this, the show has been in the news all week, which is good news for the programme, its producers, its sponsors and its broadcaster ITV. ‘X-Factor’ traditionally keeps itself in the news by feeding stories to the tabloids about how the judges all hate each other and Louis Walsh could leave at any moment. But people are wise to that now. And anyway, simply turning up the Auto-tune a little has resulted in far more coverage than Louis’ fake tantrums ever could.

The only really interesting part of this story reveals itself if you turn your attention to ‘Britain’s Got Talent’, which is, of course, made by the same production team. The most successful thing that has ever happened on that show, or to any of its contestants (or to any contestant on a Cowell-owned franchise) is Susan Boyle’s first audition in front of the celebrity panel in 2009. She went on to be one of 2009’s most successful artists – worldwide – all because of that short audition peice, which became an internet phenomenon, thanks to YouTube and some high profile tweets. And this was an audition video that – rumours now has it – was very probably Auto-tuned.

But, hey, you’ll have to go a long way to find a mainstream artist whose voice isn’t Auto-tuned, even if just a little, these days. By manipulating contestants’ voices, ‘X-Factor’ is just preparing us for the reality of what’s to come. Really, instead of banning the software, which they claim to have now done, the show’s makers should have come out this week and said: “We’re going to Auto-tune the shit out of every single voice on the show from now on, because of your ridiculous high expectations. Now shut up and take it”. And then found a sound engineer who could use the technology without making it quite so bleedin obvious.

This was the ‘Beef Of The Week’ in the 27 Aug 2010 edition of CMU Weekly, which you can read right here.

August is typically a quiet month in music, with very little going on at all. Yet this week seems to have been a busy week for music news.

Okay, maybe ‘news’ isn’t the right term for all of it. Or even much of it. 76% seems to have involved Justin Bieber in some way, while one of the week’s major stories was whether or not Guns N Roses are still playing their upcoming UK tour dates – most importantly, Reading and Leeds at the end of the month.

That particular story all started with a tweet, as things generally do these days. A message appeared on Axl Rose’s page on the social networking site informing fans that all future dates were off. Such is Axl’s reputation for being a bit flaky, half the world had reported it as fact before anyone thought to check it out. On closer inspection, it was the singer’s first tweet for three months, and was posted via Twitter’s mobile website, rather than the Twitter For iPhone app, which Axl generally uses.

A spokesperson for Reading and Leeds quickly announced that everything was fine and that Axl’s account had been hacked. Oh, those pesky hackers, I reckon we’ll see more of them in this week’s Weekly, too. So, end of story, time to get on with our lives.

Except the story has continued to bob up again and again all week. By Thursday, it was Reading and Leeds boss Melvin Benn who was giving the statements. He’d spoken to Guns N Roses’ booking agent, who had spoken to Axl, who had said everything was still on. But that tweet remains online, and neither Guns N Roses nor any of their ‘people’ have made any direct statement, which is why the story just won’t go away.

The band played their last gig last Friday, headlining the Rock N Rev festival in South Dakota, the band’s only US date this year, following tours of South America and Europe. Next up is the band’s UK tour and more mainland European dates, which are set to begin on 27 Aug at the Reading festival, before taking in arenas across Ireland, the UK and mainland Europe through to a show in Barcelona on 23 Oct.

The fact that the band have completed all but two dates of their 2009/2010 tour schedule (and those were both due to problems with the stage in South America) does suggest that Benn is right and everything is fine. But there’s still that reputation Axl’s got himself in recent years.
Back in 2002, when the new Guns N Roses first went out on tour, Axl’s failure to turn up to a number of early shows resulted in rioting, leading to the rest of the tour being cancelled. Then, in 2006, Axl cancelled the final dates of a US tour to work on completing the ‘Chinese Democracy’ album, at the same time as firing the band’s manager, Merck Mercuriadis. By this point, the band had nonetheless played numerous shows successfully, but that’s not the kind of thing people get remembered for. Especially when they’re Axl Rose.

So, wow, look at that. All this because of one tweet, eighteen words long, which probably was put there by a hacker. But Axl really does know how to start up a fuss, even if he does it unintentionally. Any other band would have deleted the tweet and issued a statement clearing the whole thing up. Other bands wouldn’t assume that some festival in the UK could put everyone straight. But I guess that’s why other bands aren’t as entertaining as Guns N Roses.

Taken from the 20 Aug 2010 edition of CMU Weekly, which you can read here.

ThreeWeeks’ Andy Malt caught up with Hollywood actress Jennifer Coolidge, ahead of her first Edinburgh show to discuss her move into stand-up

Having made her television acting debut in a 1993 episode of ‘Seinfeld’, Jennifer Coolidge has gone on to become a regular face in US TV and film, appearing in movies such as ‘Legally Blonde’, Christopher Guest’s improvised mockumentaries ‘Best In Show’, ‘A Mighty Wind’, and ‘For Your Consideration’, Werner Herzog’s remake of ‘Bad Lieutenant’, and the ‘American Pie’ series, in which she played the role she is most recognised for, Stifler’s Mom.

Prior to moving into screen acting, Coolidge made her name as a member of LA-based improv group The Groundlings, which also launched the careers of such familiar faces as Will Ferrell, Lisa Kudrow and Conan O’Brien. So, she is not without experience of live comedy performance. But now in her late 40s and with continued success on screens big and small, now still seems like an unusual time to move into stand-up.

“It’s just a strange experiment”, she explained on the phone from LA. Last summer while on holiday in Cape Cod, she decided to try performing some stories and ideas she’d been working on. “I was reading out of a notebook on stage, and it wasn’t that interesting”, she continued. “But afterwards I got a phone call to come and do it somewhere else, and then another place and another. I don’t know why, it’s just stories strung together about my experiences in Hollywood, boyfriends, being single, sex”.

The calls kept coming and she continued to accept the offers. Almost by accident, it seems, she became a stand-up comedian.

“I don’t think I would have pursued it if people hadn’t kept asking me”, she admitted. “Because the first times I did it, it wasn’t very good. In the beginning I had no idea, I could barely look up from my notebook, but I kept getting offers and next thing I know I started going round the United States”.

She quickly found that it was something she really enjoyed, a significant change from her normal life. The travelling, she conceded, can be very hard going, especially as she often goes straight from a gig to an airport to a film studio. But the whole experience has been eye-opening.

“It’s fun leaving Hollywood”, she said. “My life changed drastically since I started doing this. It’s incredibly refreshing because I wasn’t just meeting people in ‘the business’. When you’re an LA actress it can be quite an isolated life, you just hang out with your own kind. Now after shows I’m hanging out with out with firemen and all kinds of different people”.

She added, “I’ve been doing mostly television and movie jobs for the last twenty years and, except for the Christopher Guest stuff, you show up and do someone else’s thing. It’s nice to be able to say what you think and express your own opinion”.

That first show was just a year ago, and when we spoke Coolidge was preparing for her first trip to the Edinburgh Festival, with a full month-long run of shows ahead of her. Was this a daunting prospect, I wondered.

“Edinburgh could be really daunting, yeah”, she said in the most undaunted voice imaginable. “I would love for it to be well-received, but it’s not like I’ve been working on this for 25 years and it’s been my life’s goal. I’ve always wanted to go to Edinburgh, it sounds like a really fun time. If it goes terribly, there’s still some fun to be had, the show is only an hour of my day, after all”.

“Why, do you think I should be daunted?” She asked, after a pause.

In all honesty, the answer was no. Throughout our conversation, Coolidge was disarmingly friendly and engaging, it’s hard to imagine any audience not instantly warming to her. But with such a wide range of comedy movies under her belt, what kind of audience does she find she attracts, and does she meet their expectations?

“I don’t know what people would expect”, she confessed. “I have done the show in certain cities where people have thought I’d be doing scenes from ‘Legally Blonde’, and are shocked that the show is a bit filthy”.

As for who she attracts, she continued, “The show’s audience is an incredibly strange mixture. Young guys show up for ‘American Pie’, then the female factor is there for ‘Legally Blonde’, there’s an older group – people above 30 all know the Christopher Guest films – and then there’s sort of a black audience because of ‘Pootie Tang’”.

Speaking of expectations, finally I ask what she hopes for from her first jaunt to the Fringe. “I’m gonna crash all the shows”, she announced excitedly. “I have other friends over there, plus there’s a million acts I don’t know”.

“How many shows are there?” She quickly shot back. Roughly 2000, I estimate. “Wow”, Coolidge says. “I hope I get to see all 2000!”

Taken from ThreeWeeks in Edinburgh 2010. View this interview on the ThreeWeeks website here or check out the online version of the entire paper here.

Last weekend began in an interesting way. I found myself wandering through derelict tunnels underneath Waterloo Station, where I stumbled upon a small theatre.

Okay, I was expecting the theatre to be there, I’m not generally in the habit of wandering into damp, smelly tunnels in the hope of finding entertainment. No matter what you’ve heard. I was there because the Old Vic has commandeered part of the space deep underneath the train station for a series of events this year.

Last week saw two performances of graphic novel writer Alan Moore’s new spoken word album, ‘Unearthing’, with musical backing provided by Crook&Flail (aka Adam ‘Doseone’ Drucker and Fog’s Andrew Broder).

On paper, it doesn’t sound like much: Alan Moore delivers a biography of one of his friends, writer Steve Moore (no relation), set to abstract electronic music with accompanying photographs by Mitch Jenkins projected on a screen behind the stage. In fact, it sounds quite pretentious. And maybe it was a little, but that was easily diffused by Moore’s fantastic writing and unforced humour, all delivered in his distinct Northampton accent.

The story, told over the course of three hours (with two fifteen minute intervals), was far more grand, epic even, than you could possibly expect of a biography of a comic writer who has lived in the same house in Shooter’s Hill – “where Kent begins and London disappears” – for his entire life, save for a misjudged period of three months. It goes back through the history of the area, treating it as much as a character as anyone or anything else in the story, and through the eventual meeting of his parents before getting on to his travels through the words of comics and the occult.

As Moore spoke, Drucker and Broder’s soundtrack (played with the help of Jeff ‘Jel’ Logan), swooped and swelled behind him, rising up to add to the drama, or falling completely away to punctuate the story. Jenkins’ photography and graphical interpretations added yet more tone and colour, though the focus was always the words.

In fact, perhaps the most impressive thing was the delivery of the words. In three hours, Moore never fluffed one of them. Never stumbled, coughed or even, as far as I could hear, breathed. It was a completely hypnotic, gripping and intense show; that intensity ramped up by the fact that we were sitting in a damp, dark tunnel with rusted corrugated iron hanging from the ceiling and the entire space often shaken around us by the deep rumble of overhead trains. Simply stunning.

Taken from my editorial in this edition of CMU Weekly.